Sexuality. Sexual Expression. Sexual Orientation. Sexual Identity.
What ever the phrase, it’s about

SEX.

 

From “prude” to “pervert” it seems that no other topic has so much judgment surrounding it. Sex. One of the first things to do to talk safely about sex is to identify and accept that sex is…whether it be for pleasure or procreation, sexuality is a part of being alive, and it is a topic that seems to still be taboo for many.

And understandably so. Many people have been sexually abused, both girls, and boys. Some have been used for sex. Some use sex as a weapon themselves. Some use sex to escape intimacy, others to solidify the emotional and even spiritual connection with their partner. Some people use porn to release deeper anxieties or “energies.” Some are identified as “frigid.” Sexual energy is but one channel of a greater creative energy that’s present. Often the archetype of The Lover and all of its forms represent sex, but, The Lover represents so much more.

If you have questions, concerns, thoughts, feelings, judgments, beliefs, wants or desires that you feel the need to or simply would like to express, and don’t have an outlet, let’s talk about it. Let’s talk about sex. Let’s talk about what it means to you. From questions about what it means “to be a man,” or what it means to be feminine, “to be a woman,” to questions about sexual orientation or identity, let’s talk about it and and move safely through any issues that are slowing you from fully living your life the way that you want to.

Intimacy.

Sex isn’t defined as Intimacy, but Intimacy can be expressed as Sex.

If the first thing that you think of when you hear the word “Intimacy” is “sex,” you might be surprised to know that there are actually six different types of intimacy, only one is sexual. In my work, and in my life, I define Intimacy as “a natural byproduct of open, honest, communication.”

I also define it simply as “connection.” Intimacy is about connection; it has to do with connection and relationship. Whether it be a friendship connection, a sexual connection, a romantic relationship or a connection to a pet, sibling or even to God. Intimacy is about how we relate to an other, and even how we relate to ourselves.

Intimacy can be scary, and it affects every area of our lives… how close we are to our coworkers at work, our neighbors, our “intimate” partners the person behind the counter at the local Starbucks. And ultimately how we treat ourselves. Our ideas about intimacy can affect our anxiety levels, and how we cope in life.

Helping you identify, explore and create effective life coping strategies is one of my intentions. So give me a call, set up an appointment, let’s talk about anxiety, at your speed and no faster, let’s talk about intentions, and keep or get your life going at the speed you want your life to go. what you want.

Coming Out…from what…a closet? Ok…but from WHAT closet? and what does the closet really represent?

The phrase “coming out” often is related to a man or a woman who is bisexual, gay, or lesbian “coming out” of the closet, implying a “hiding” of the acknowledgment of one’s sexual orientation–that is “hiding” their natural attractions that they have. This can be a HUGE deal.

For me, coming out has even broader meanings. Coming Out can also mean:

• Coming Out as a Nudist
• Coming Out as someone into Leather
• Coming Out as Swinger
• Coming Out as liking Country music
• Coming Out as liking Glee

There are straight people that “come out” as being into SM or BD (sadism/masochism or bondage/domination). Others “come out” as nudists, or doll collectors, or any number of things. The idea of “coming out” really started with Plato’s “Cave” analogy (ask me about that when you come in!). It means coming clean with myself more than anything else

In our lives, secrets can eat us up from the inside-out. Coming Out simply is not holding onto that secret, whatever it is, and releasing it. Letting out the secret in a safe way, in a safe space is the “coming out of the closet.” It’s the sending up the balloon of our fears and truly releasing it so that we feel more whole in our lives.

Coming out has the implication of bringing a part of myself, whatever part that may be, into acknowledgment and ultimately, acceptance. Acceptance of something about myself that I’ve not up to this point accepted.As I see it, it takes courage to come out. Whether the acknowledgement is one of a sexual nature or of something completely different.